It is said that it takes two to a fight. This means that there is not necessarily a desire for a conflict, but a desire that one cannot avoid it. This desire seems innocent because it can be satisfied with a passive attitude, but it can get us into a conflict without us even being aware of it. Therefore, it is important for you to learn how to avoid an aggressive conversation.
People talk together to understand each other. But this can be difficult if both people focus most on their mood and keep some distance. In these cases, it is important to be careful and not escalate an aggressive conversation.
How can we avoid an aggressive conversation? We can do this easily if we know certain strategies and use them if we feel the conversation is running off track.
Stay focused on the conversation to avoid an aggressive conversation
Many people know this technique as the “same groove.” It consists of repeating your point over and over again and ignoring anything that does not come close to it. It’s a way to redirect the conversation to reassure ourselves and not fall into the other person’s aggressive traps.
This technique helps us avoid an aggressive conversation because it keeps the conversation on track using rational expressions. When you focus on this, you are able to neutralize all other messages that could affect your emotions and disrupt the current purpose of the conversation.
Share as little as possible
This is an effective technique to avoid an aggressive conversation, especially if the other person keeps adding indirect messages to the conversation that are meant to make us uncomfortable. It consists of keeping the conversation as short as possible, in order to make the other person express themselves more clearly.
The goal of this technique is to help you avoid accusations, for most of them will seem aggressive. They tend to create confusion and conflict. If you express yourself clearly and make sure that the other person understands what you are saying, then you will experience non-aggressive conversations to a greater extent.
Remember that you are not always right
During a conversation, both parties would like to think they are right. Both parties will tend to make affirmations on things they are not entirely sure about, so as not to look vulnerable. Keep in mind this trend and try to control it. This will reduce the likelihood that the conversation will take an aggressive turn.
By expressing that the other party is also right, one can eliminate any conflicts right from the start and avoid an aggressive conversation. By doing this, you reduce the possibility that the conversation will end in disagreements. That way you avoid the aggressiveness.
This technique is about deliberately ignoring the things that may offend one or bother one in any way. You only need to focus on the important aspects of the discussion. Here one thinks of deliberately ignoring the other if they do not address you in a proper way.
The other party will soon discover that their words do not seem to have any effect on you. Then they will soon stop it. The right thing is to focus on the positive, to get the conversation pulled up from the negative hole the other is trying to hold it in.
For example, if someone says, “you never pay attention to me. We agreed to go to the cinema on Friday and again you came too late ”. Then the good answer will be: “Do you want to go to the cinema tonight and go out to eat afterwards? Then I can do well again ”.
Use this technique if the other person starts accusing you of something. The ideal is to focus on one thing at a time. If you include all the topics at once, it will be harder for you to choose the right strategy.
Without thinking about it, the other person will try to start a conflict. They will do anything to get you drawn into it. It is quite common to blame others for everything. They attack to make the other respond automatically.
It is true that disagreement is good and enriching. But if we turn it into something negative, we will only focus on defending our position. It is a mistake that only leads to an aggressive conversation. And that kind of conversation never comes out of anything good!