Many couples today are being formed through the internet. Many times it produces sustained and healthy relationship. But there are also many examples that have not ended so well.
Today’s topic is the dangers of online relationships.
We all know that there are millions of people on the Internet behind a screen. This makes it very easy for them to use a false identity or hide their mistakes.
When we face a person, we see both their strengths and their weaknesses. If we decide to enter into a relationship, then we have a good sense of who they are as a person.
The fewer mistakes we see in a person, the more fascinated we are by their illusion. The more mistakes you see, the less intense the emotions become. Although we continue to admire them.
What happens when a relationship is not face to face?
When we communicate with someone through a screen, we lack the non-verbal language. The way the person looks at one, speaks and laughs and their appearance are pretty important things.
While it is obvious that no one will only fall in love with a person’s physical appearance, there will have to be an attraction. Something that makes it move inside us.
It’s okay to get to know someone online. But we must be aware that this is only part of the picture. You also have to meet the person. Only when we know both facets (cyber and reality) can we say that we like the person.
Everyone has heard or seen something about people who claim they are in love with someone they have not met in person. But that’s not real. Those emotions exist only in their imagination.
The imagination is enhanced by the nice messages we get on our screen. Because there is no image, the mind invents one. It idealizes the person and creates the prototype that we desire.
Love on the internet has created problems for many people. Many disappointments arise, such as receiving pictures that do not look like the real person at all. One must also remember that the written words do not reflect the true personality of the person.
Therefore, it is best to insist that a cyber relationship should become a relationship in reality as soon as possible. The sooner we discover the reality of the situation and see the person in reality, the sooner we can make an informed decision.
Why are online emotions stronger?
Many people claim that they have had much stronger feelings for a person online than in reality. This is because, real conditions just show reality and one sees everything there is to see.
But if one has not experienced the reality around another person, then the mind begins to fantasize and create an idealized person. One that you want in your life and that you think would be ideal.
All these things happen unconsciously. Over time, the person transforms into the illusion one has created. At some point, it becomes so intense that it has the potential to hurt more than necessary. I know several people who have suffered from being in online relationships. When they realized what the mind is doing when it does not have enough information, they could stick a finger in the ground and stop the unwanted emotions.
Talking to someone online without ever seeing them is like being in a fantasy world. The people who are most vulnerable to the dangers of an online relationship are the ones who tend to be dreamers. They are also typically dissatisfied with their real lives.
Five tips to use if you are looking for love online
- When you get feelings for someone, remember that if you have not seen them in real life, it does not apply. Since your mind does not have real information that one would want in reality, then it becomes idealized. It creates a spurious figure who is far from the truth.
- Do not just have online relationships. It is perfectly okay to get to know someone in writing, but it should not continue for too long. Getting to know someone through a screen should always be followed by a meeting as soon as possible.
- Do not build a relationship with someone who lives in another country. I know many who have fallen in love with someone they could not meet because they lived in another country. So they literally spent years communicating back and forth. One suffers for a love that cannot exist. Most have a job and a life that cannot be easily moved. People who do this live in a fantasy world of superficial love.
- Forget about people who are married or in a relationship, even if they say they want to end that relationship. Many people fall for it. One who is in a relationship assures the other that things are not going well in that relationship. That they are finishing it. But often they simply try to hold on to the other person so that they can continue their infidelity. With so many fish in the ocean, why take a risk with someone who is making trouble from the start?
- Remember that you never know who you are talking to. Everyone can be nice, caring, attentive and perfect through one screen. But behind the screen, there may be a person with a mental illness who does not let them have real relationships. Maybe they are creating a fake life for themselves.
Beware of the dangers of online relationships
The danger of online relationships becomes greater when life is not satisfactory. People search online for what they can not achieve in reality. One must be very careful as, just like people who are worth meeting, there are also people at the other end of the scale. Some who are sick and deceptive.
Pictures by Alexander Kuznetsov and JenavieveMarie